Welcome to my Blog
Thank you for stopping by. This space is where I share research, reflections, and practical tools drawn from my experience as a marriage and family therapist with an international practice.
I write about what happens to desire, attachment, and meaning once the early myths stop working.
Are you a couple looking for clarity? A professional curious about the science of relationships? Or simply someone interested in how love and resilience work? I'm glad you've found your way here. I can help with that. I'm accepting new clients, and this blog is for the benefit of all my gentle readers.
Each post is written with one goal in mind: to help you better understand yourself, your partner, and the hidden dynamics that shape human connection
Grab a coffee (or a notebook), explore what speaks to you, and take what's useful back into your life and relationships.
And if a post sparks a question, or makes you realize you could use more support, l'd love to hear from you. Let's explore the scope of work you'd like to do together.
Be Well, Stay Kind, and Godspeed.
~ Daniel
P.S.
Feel free to explore the categories below to find past blog posts on the topics that matter most to you. If you're curious about attachment, navigating conflict, or strengthening intimacy, these archives are a great way to dive deeper into the research and insights that l've been sharing for years.
- Attachment Issues
- Coronavirus
- Couples Therapy
- Extramarital Affairs
- Family Life and Parenting
- How to Fight Fair
- Inlaws and Extended Families
- Intercultural Relationships
- Marriage and Mental Health
- Married Life & Intimate Relationships
- Neurodiverse Couples
- Separation & Divorce
- Signs of Trouble
- Social Media and Relationships
- What Happy Couples Know
Leaving your marriage for your affair partner?
Affair partners exist in an artificial bubble. The affair exists as an antidote to a bad marriage. Affairs are fueled by comparison.
But once the bubble bursts and the comparison is rendered irrelevant, the new marriage has to stand on its own merits.
Here’s solid advice on increasing your odds…
Rebuilding trust and connection in your marriage after you’ve cheated…
When infidelity strikes a marriage, the aftermath can be devastating.
For the partner who cheated, it's crucial to understand the profound impact of your actions on your spouse.
Issues of trust, vulnerability, and deep hurt come to the forefront, requiring a thoughtful and empathetic approach…
3 Strategies for coping with infidelity
Once an affair is out in the open, each partner has their own tasks in coping with infidelity.
However, couples typically display one of three distinct strategies for coping with infidelity.
One of the reasons affair recovery is such a widespread problem in couples therapy is that 2 of these 3 strategies are naturally occurring and don’t work very well for couples in the long run…
When your husband won’t end his affair…
The last thing you want to do is behave in such a way that drives your husband closer to his affair partner.
This is a time for differentiation and strategic moves. If you want to restore your marriage to health, you need a carefully thought-out stance.
Play a thoughtfully considered “long game.” I can help with that…
What percentage of marriages survive infidelity?
What percentage of marriages survive infidelity?
As bad as you may be hurting right now, most couples (60-80%) rebuild trust and leave couples therapy with their marriages in a much better place.
After sorting and weighing several sources of data, the destructive impact of infidelity accounts for somewhere between 20-40% of American divorces.
Serial infidelity and personality disorders…
Serial infidelity has been correlated with personality disorders.
To be specific, three personality disorders; Narcissism, Borderline Personality Disorder, and Psychopathy.
It’s important to point out that not every unfaithful spouse has a personality disorder, nor does every spouse with some degree of personality disorder engage in infidelity…
Narcissism and infidelity
Why is narcissism so closely correlated with infidelity? Narcissism and infidelity are wrapped around the idea of entitlement. The narcissist sees their dalliance as acceptable, but their partner is expected to remain faithful.
Infidelity and Addiction…
Infidelity and addiction are two deeply complex… and often intertwined issues that can wreak havoc on humans and relationships alike.
While infidelity refers to the breach of trust and commitment in a romantic relationship, addiction encompasses a range of compulsive behaviors, including substance abuse and problematic behaviors such as gambling or sex addiction … Let’s jump in!
How should I act toward my cheating spouse?
If divorce is off the table, how you act toward your cheating spouse can minimize your suffering.
Some say these tips are too ambitious…let’s see…
3 Predictable stages of affair recovery
Healing from infidelity is possible.
However, it requires emotional, spiritual, and mental determination to stubbornly recover into fully functional, restored intimacy.
Here’s what we need to do…
What is an exit affair?
I’m thinking about the lyrics to an old Englebert Humperdinck song “Please Release Me.”
When it was first released in 1967, it struck a chord, knocking the Beatles' Strawberry Fields Forever from the number one position by selling 85,000 copies a day!
Please Release Me” is the anthem of the Exit affair…
Ending an emotional affair with a co-worker: how does a big problem not get bigger?
If you realize that you are sliding into an emotional affair with a coworker, you first need to stop kidding yourself.
Ending an emotional relationship with a co-worker isn’t easy when the consequences are not readily apparent.
Here are 7 ways to snap the f*ck out of it…