Love is never one-size-fits-all.

Add neurodivergence into the mix, and you have a relationship that requires a level of customization akin to ordering the perfect coffee at an overcomplicated café—“I’d like a double-shot, oat milk, half-caf, extra-foam, three-pump lavender latte with a hint of cinnamon.”

For neurodiverse couples, traditional therapy models often feel equally mismatched.

However, Solution-Focused Brief Therapy (SFBT)—is a therapeutic model that doesn’t dwell on fixing deficits but instead helps couples harness their strengths.

A case study applying this approach to a neurodiverse couple over twelve sessions revealed remarkable improvements in communication and emotional awareness.

However, their individual journeys toward relationship satisfaction varied, underscoring the need for personalized therapeutic approaches that account for each partner’s distinct experiences.

Modern love is becoming exceedingly complicated.

Add neurodivergence into the mix, and you have a dynamic, sometimes bewildering, but often deeply fulfilling relationship experience.

One trend bubbling up in neurodiverse communities is the preference for neurodivergent partners—an inclination that might just be backed by both lived experience and research.

But is it always the best choice? And what does science have to say? Let’s dive in.

Modern dating has abandoned the ideal of finding a "perfect" partner.

Instead, it has fully embraced the beautiful disaster that is human attraction, where quirks, eccentricities, and borderline bizarre obsessions aren’t just tolerated—they’re the foundation of connection.

Enter freak matching, the latest dating trend that takes the phrase "there’s someone for everyone" to new and occasionally unsettling heights.

What Is Freak Matching?

Freak matching is the idea that the very traits that make you undateable to most people are precisely what make you irresistible to the right person.

In essence, freak matching is dating Darwinism at its finest—survival of the quirkiest.

You’ve had this conversation before.

Maybe it starts with a casual, "How was your day?" and somehow spirals into a full-scale interrogation. "What did you have for lunch? Why did you pick that? Did you talk to anyone interesting? What exactly did they say? Did you see that thing in the news? What do you think about it?"

At first, it was cute. Then, it became exhausting.

And now, you’re left wondering: Why does my partner question me so much?

Are they just curious? Anxious? Controlling? Or is this just how their brain works?

Let’s explore the psychology behind serial questioning, including its links to neurodiversity, Attachment Theory, and emotional regulation.

So, your partner has once again responded to your heartfelt sharing with a blank stare, an unhelpful "That sucks," or worse—absolute silence.

Maybe they changed the subject, scrolled their phone mid-conversation, or dismissed your feelings entirely with a well-intentioned but wildly frustrating, "You’re overreacting."

At this point, you may be asking yourself: Are they emotionally stunted? Do they even care? Is this just how relationships work?

Before you draft an impassioned breakup text, let’s explore the science behind emotional neglect—because it’s rarely just about them being a jerk.

The way people respond (or don’t respond) to emotions is shaped by neurobiology, attachment styles, cultural expectations, and personality differences.

Is your partner truly emotionally unavailable… or just different?

A recent study published in Psychopharmacology has found that some autistic adults report lasting improvements in mental health and social engagement following psychedelic experiences.

This research suggests that psychedelics, including LSD and psilocybin, may reduce distress and social anxiety while increasing social connectedness.

However, the study also underscores the need for caution, as a minority of participants reported negative experiences.

Dr. Gordon Neufeld and Dr. Gabor Maté’s seminal work Hold On to Your Kids (2005) explores how attachment—the invisible yet mighty force that binds humans together—shapes our emotional development.

But what happens when the brain itself is wired a little differently?

Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) and Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) don’t just tweak the settings of attention and impulse control; they fundamentally alter how humans bond, express love, and interpret connection.

Let's examine how neurodiversity influences attachment, why conventional bonding theories don’t always fit, and how we can build bridges of connection that honor these differences rather than force them into neurotypical molds.

Somewhere in an alternate universe—or possibly just an Applebee’s on a Saturday night—neurotypical couples are having their version of a "perfect" date night.

There are candles, shared appetizers, and whispered sweet nothings that mean precisely nothing.

Meanwhile, our neurodivergent friends, God bless them, are trying not to be destroyed by the flickering fluorescent lights, the clatter of forks against porcelain, and the soul-crushing obligation to make direct eye contact for an extended period.

So, let’s get this straight: For some, traditional date nights are a capitalist hallucination.

For those whose nervous systems resemble a 1950s radio in a lightning storm, we need something else. Something better.

For decades, ADHD (Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder) has been understood through the lens of inattention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity—a classic trio that makes school, work, and relationships an uphill battle.

But what if we’ve been missing something?

What if the emotional rollercoaster—the meltdowns, the mood swings, the struggle to self-soothe—isn’t just a side effect of ADHD, but a core part of it?

New research published in Nature Mental Health suggests exactly that.

A study analyzing longitudinal brain data from the Adolescent Brain Cognitive Development (ABCD) Study found that emotion dysregulation is a key pathway to ADHD, potentially as important as the well-documented cognitive and motivational dysfunctions (Hou et al., 2024).

In other words, ADHD isn’t just about struggling to pay attention or sit still. It’s also about struggling to regulate emotions—a factor that may explain why standard ADHD medications don’t fully work for everyone.

So, what did the researchers discover? And what does this mean for treatment, diagnosis, and the way we think about ADHD? Let’s dive in.

The intersection of Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) and gender-expansive behavior has garnered increasing attention in clinical and academic research.

ADHD, a neurodevelopmental disorder marked by impulsivity, executive dysfunction, and emotional dysregulation, appears to have a notable correlation with gender variance, including gender nonconformity, nonbinary identities, and gender fluidity.

This paper explores the research linking ADHD to gender identity development, highlighting neuropsychological, social, and emotional factors that contribute to this phenomenon.

A meta-analysis of studies on children and adolescents with ADHD found that they are at an increased risk of depression and anxiety disorders.

However, taking stimulant medication for ADHD was associated with a reduced risk of depression.

The paper was published in the Journal of Psychiatric Research.

Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a neurodevelopmental condition that affects attention, impulsivity, and activity levels.

Kids with ADHD tend to struggle with staying focused, following instructions, or controlling impulses. It is commonly diagnosed in childhood (usually at the start of school) but can continue into well into adulthood.

We seem to be living in an age in which resilience is championed and emotional toughness is often equated with success.

In such world, high sensitivity can feel like a liability.

But for an estimated 15–20% of the population, sensitivity is not just a temperament—it’s a neurobiological reality (Aron, 1997). These individuals, known as Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs), experience the world more intensely than their peers, processing sensory input, emotions, and social cues at a much deeper level.

But what exactly makes an HSP different? Is high sensitivity a disorder, an advantage, or simply a variation of normal human neurobiology? And how does this trait intersect with other forms of neurodiversity, such as autism, ADHD, and giftedness?

This post will take a deep, research-backed dive into the world of HSPs, exploring their biological underpinnings, their connection to other forms of neurodivergence, the challenges they face, and the ways they can harness their unique strengths to thrive.