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The IKEA Relationship Principle: what assembling furniture says about your relationship
Assembling IKEA furniture has become a modern-day rite of passage for couples, testing their patience, communication, and problem-solving skills.
It's more than just a chore—it's a relationship exercise that can reveal a lot about how partners work together.
I like to call it the "IKEA Relationship Principle": if you can assemble a shelf together without breaking up, you can handle anything.
In this blog post, we'll dive into why this principle is more than just a funny meme.
We'll explore how it ties into the science of relationships, specifically research by John Gottman, and discuss therapeutic interventions that harness playful cooperation to strengthen relationships.
The Power of Playfulness in Relationships
When was the last time you and your partner shared a belly laugh, made up a goofy inside joke, or just acted plain silly together?
If you can’t remember, it might be time to reconnect with your playful side.
Playfulness in relationships isn’t just fun; it’s an essential ingredient for maintaining a healthy, resilient bond.
In this post, we'll explore how being silly together can prevent serious problems, why playfulness might just be the secret sauce to long-term happiness in your relationship, and how it serves as an antidote to anxiety and fear in an increasingly anxious age.
Retail Therapy Meme: the neuroscience and psychology behind shopping to feel better
We’ve all seen the “retail therapy meme” circulating on social media, portraying shopping as the ultimate cure for a bad day.
But how much truth is there to this popular belief? Is retail therapy a harmless way to boost your mood, or does it have darker consequences?
Let’s dive deep into the neuroscience and psychology behind retail therapy, exploring what happens when shopping becomes more than just a feel-good hobby.
The Power of Face-to-Face Conversations and Bestowed Attention
In an era where digital communication often substitutes real-life interactions, the significance of face-to-face conversations cannot be overstated.
Research continues to demonstrate that engaging in meaningful, in-person conversations significantly enhances happiness and reduces loneliness.
As social beings, humans have an intrinsic need to belong and feel valued, and simple face-to-face interactions fulfill this need in ways that digital communication simply cannot.
Vision Boards: A Modern Cave Painting in the Journey of Love
Vision boards: The modern-day cave paintings where love’s dreams are drawn, and life’s magic begins.
As a couples therapist, I often encounter couples at various stages of their relationships, each with unique challenges and aspirations.
One tool that has gained popularity in recent years is the vision board—a collage of images, words, and symbols representing the goals and dreams a person or couple hopes to achieve.
While some dismiss vision boards as mere "magical thinking," I see them as a modern echo of ancient practices like cave painting, imbued with the power to focus the mind and transform intentions into reality.
Rediscovering Lost Loves: why older Americans are reconnecting with past romances
In recent years, a fascinating trend has emerged among older Americans in the dating scene: reconnecting with past romantic partners.
Many older adults are revisiting old connections, whether it's rekindling a relationship with a high school sweetheart, a college flame, or even an ex-spouse.
But why is this happening now, and what does it reveal about human growth and relationships across decades? As a couples therapist, I’ve seen the powerful emotions and profound changes that accompany these reunions, and this phenomenon is worth exploring in depth.
The Impact of Social Media on Infidelity
In the age of digital connectivity, social media has revolutionized the way we interact, communicate, and even engage in romantic relationships.
However, this new landscape also presents unique challenges, particularly concerning fidelity in romantic partnerships.
As a science-based couples therapist, I've observed a growing trend where social media plays a pivotal role in the dynamics of infidelity and relationship satisfaction.
This post explores the significant impact of social media on infidelity rates and how it affects relationship satisfaction, drawing from credible social science research.
Unlocking the Power of Neurodivergent Strengths: A Shift from Deficits to Contributions
In the evolving landscape of neurodiversity, a significant shift is taking place—a movement from focusing on deficits to recognizing and celebrating the strengths and contributions of neurodivergent folks everywhere.
As a science-based couples therapist, often assisting clients grappling with work-related issues, I find this paradigm shift both inspiring and essential.
Buddhist Compassion: Cultivating Kindness in Relationships
Buddhist teachings on compassion and mindfulness offer powerful tools for enhancing relational dynamics.
As a science-based couples therapist, I see how these principles can transform relationships by fostering kindness and empathy.
My work often revolves around alleviating "meaningless suffering" in relationships, and the practices derived from Buddhism provide a profound means to achieve this.
I advise my clients to integrate compassion and mindfulness into their daily interactions. In doing so, couples can create a more nurturing and supportive partnership.
Taoist Harmony: Balancing Yin and Yang in Relationships
Taoism, with its profound emphasis on balance and harmony, provides valuable insights for modern relationships.
As a marriage and family therapist, I've seen how the principles of Yin and Yang can help couples navigate the complexities of relational dynamics.
By understanding and applying these ancient concepts, couples can foster a more harmonious and balanced partnership, enhancing both emotional and physical intimacy.
Indigenous Spirituality: Honoring Connection and Community
Indigenous spirituality offers a wealth of wisdom on the importance of connection and community.
As a science-based marriage and family therapist, I believe that these principles can profoundly impact our relational dynamics.
The emphasis on interconnectedness, respect for nature, and the value of ancestral wisdom provides a holistic approach to fostering healthy and fulfilling relationships.
Stoicism in Relationships: Finding Strength in Adversity
Many have found that the ancient philosophy of Stoicism offers timeless wisdom that can be applied to enhance our relationships.
As a science-based marriage and family therapist, I often see couples struggling with heartbreaking adversity.
Let's explore how Stoic principles can help us build stronger, more resilient relationships, and dive deep into the realm of intimacy.