Saturday, November 14, 2026.
On having a child, waiting for things to settle down, and finding out what your partner thought you were waiting for.
The baby would be in preschool by now if they’d had it the first time they said after the election.
She does the arithmetic while he tries to find a lid for a plastic container.
They have seven lids and six containers. One lid has survived two moves on the strength of his conviction that its container will turn up.
“Do you still want to have a kid?” she asks.
He puts the lid down.
“Tonight?”
Under slightly different circumstances she would have laughed.
What November was supposed to tell them
Her office had laid off eleven people, including the woman who used to remind everyone to sign the birthday cards. Now they found out about one another’s birthdays on LinkedIn, along with who had found another job.
His mother had offered to help with a baby. She lived six hours away and had described herself as just a phone call away, which was true of everybody they knew.
In June he’d sent her an article about Senate Democrats’ plan to make childcare more affordable. He asked if it might help them.
She read it twice, once as a voter and once as somebody trying to figure out what number to put in a spreadsheet. They agreed to see what happened in November. (Senate Democratic Caucus).
When it became clear that Democrats had won both chambers, she reopened the spreadsheet. Trump would still be in the White House, and the plan she’d read about in June was still a proposal. She put the same number back in the cell (New America).
He called the childcare center near the house. They closed at five-thirty. He told the woman on the phone that they could make that work. When he hung up, his wife asked which days he was thinking he’d leave work early.
He’d been thinking about how close the center was to her office.
What he heard in the car
Before the midterms, about one in four adults in a 2026 American Psychological Association survey said stress, uncertainty, or feeling overwhelmed had led them to stop planning for the future, delay a major life decision, or both (American Psychological Association).
“I thought you wanted to wait until you felt ready,” he says.
“I thought that was you.”
He starts to remind her of a conversation in the car. She remembers it too. She’d said she couldn’t imagine getting pregnant and then finding out she was next on the layoff list. He’d said, “Of course.” She took that as agreement about the layoff list. He took it as agreement about the baby.
“Do you want one?” he asks.
“Yes,” she says. Then she looks at him. “Some days I don’t. Is that going to be a problem?”
He’s surprised by how much easier it is to answer her now.
“I don’t know,” he says. “When I picture it, the kid’s already six. We’re at the hardware store and she wants to know what everything does.”
“She?”
“Apparently.”
His wife smiles.
“I can see her asking me about the little drawers with all the screws in them,” he says. “I have a harder time picturing myself getting up at three in the morning and being somebody you’d want there.”
She waits. He’s about to make a joke. She knows this because she is about to make one too.
“Sometimes I picture the baby,” she says, “and sometimes I picture asking you to take the baby.”
He sits down.
Tuesday
They spend twenty minutes talking about who got up the last time the dog was sick. This seems to both of them like a petty thing to bring up until they discover that each remembers being the one who got up.
“You washed the blanket,” she says eventually.
“You slept on the floor with him.”
She’d forgotten about the blanket. Until he said so, she hadn’t known he’d seen her on the floor.
They agree to talk again Tuesday. He says he’ll find out which days he can leave early. She asks if he’d tell her on Tuesday whether he’d be sad if they never had a child. He says he’ll think about it. She says she will too.
As they’re turning off the lights, he asks if she wants him to put it on the calendar.
“Sure.”
He types Baby discussion. She looks over his shoulder.
“That sounds like the baby asked for a meeting.”
He changes it to Kitchen, after dinner and sends her the invitation.
Her phone lights up on the counter between them. They’re both still standing there when she accepts.
Related reading
If you and your partner keep postponing a decision that matters to both of you, you can explore my couples therapy services or get in touch for a free introductory call.
Be Well, Stay Kind, and Godspeed.
REFERENCES:
American Psychological Association. (2026). Stress in America™ 2026: The stress of uncertainty. https://www.apa.org/pubs/reports/stress-in-america/2026