More breaking research narratives about why we need not fear the internet…
Friday, December 29, 2023. Yeah, I know I’ve been kinda cranky lately, but here’s a philosophical question that has been tormenting me of late…
Why do human have a perverse propensity for misusing almost any and every technology ever invented?
Here’s what we’re being told now…the growth of internet usage in the last 20 years or so has only had very small effects on mental well-being, according to new data from over two million humans around the world.
The associations found between internet use and mental illness were so infinitesimally small, and insignificant to suggest the internet is causing any widespread psychological harm to humans…
They looked everywhere… honest!
How the study was conducted
The researchers looked at data from humans living in 168 countries. The study subjects were aged 15 to 89, because we need to dilute the measurable impact on kiddos perhaps?
Professor Andrew Przybylski, from prestigious Oxford University (so we know it’s trustworthy!) study co-author, said:
“We looked very hard for a ‘smoking gun’ linking technology and well-being and we didn’t find it.”
Dr. Matti Vuorre, the study’s first author, said:
“We studied the most extensive data on well-being and internet adoption ever considered, both over time and population demographics. Although we couldn’t address causal effects of internet use, our descriptive results indicated small and inconsistent associations.”
They looked everywhere… honest!
In other words… no link to bad outcomes!
These conclusions are from international surveys conducted between 2005 and 2022, during which time internet use massively increased around the world at a breakneck speed.
The researchers also looked at data gathered concerning anxiety, depression and self-harm between 2000 and 2019 for approximately 200 countries.
The results of both the international surveys, and the data collected on anxiety and depression suggested that internet use had very little linkage with psychological well-being.
And remember! More doctors smoke Camels than any other brand!
The researchers explained their conclusions:
“We put our findings under a more extreme test to see if there are matters which we have missed and we did find increased mobile broadband adoption predicted greater life satisfaction, but this association was too small to be of practical significance.”
Despite ongoing concerns, and other contradictory research, the Oxford researchers assure us that no special patterns were seen among certain groups, such as women and young girls. Professor Przybylski elaborated:
“We meticulously tested whether there is anything special in terms of age or gender, but there is no evidence to support popular ideas that certain groups are more at risk.”
They looked everywhere… honest!
Nothing to see here! Click through please….
Here’s the truth of it. We’ ll only fully understand the connection between internet use and mental health if the technology companies share their fu*king data.
And since they are not… on what basis are you soothing our concerns?
Problem internet usage? Not in this political world….
Still, none of these findings rule out internet usage being problematic for a few unfortunate and misguided humans here and there….
This study is only looking at broad populations. It isn’t designed to perceive the effects on the internet has on vulnerable populations…
How fu*king convenient..
We human beings have a tremendous propensity for misusing almost any and every technology we’ve ever invented — but this study tells us to move on… there is nothing to see here.
They looked everywhere… honest!
There is absolutely nothing about the internet that is in anyway inherently bad for human well-being.
As ever, Atlas shrugs… and spits out.. fu*k you, and your political meddling… they tell us…it is not what you do, it’s the way that you do it. We built it for you, now it’s your problem.
Here’s the reason this study is egregious bullsh*t…
But, the team insists, technology companies need to provide more data, if there is to be conclusive evidence of the impacts of internet use.
So as a published researcher let me ask.. how can this study be simultaneously “landmark” and “inconclusive?”
The researchers offer a caveat that you can drive a fu*king Mack truck through:
‘Research on the effects of internet technologies is stalled because the data most urgently needed are collected and held behind closed doors by technology companies and online platforms.
‘It is crucial to study, in more detail and with more transparency from all stakeholders, data on individual adoption of and engagement with Internet-based technologies.
These data exist and are continuously analysed by global technology firms for marketing and product improvement but unfortunately are not accessible for independent research.’
They looked everywhere… honest!
Question… how can you claim a landmark study when you admittedly lack the data you need for independent research, perhaps someone thinks we’re actually that fu*king stupid (admittedly ‘collaborating’ with game companies?)…it’s Oxford after all! …It must be good!
So I’ve always believed in follow the money…
Are you surprised that this prestigious research team is funded by a politically conservative Chinese hedge fund headquartered in London with 23 billion under management?
I’m shocked…
This hedge fund maintains what is called a Crisis Alpha Strategy. This strategy exploits persistent trends without bias, or pity, I might add.
This means they are focused on liquidity, opportunity, and having no preconceived ideas. Speed is also important in a crisis alpha strategy because it allows the traders to adapt quickly to changing market conditions.
So, why would one of the largest hedge fund in Great Britain be funding research on how safe the internet is for humans? That’s obvious, because out of the goodness of their hearts, they want to know the truth, no matter where or how their 24 billion is invested…
And remember…they looked everywhere… honest!
We live in a political world
Where love don't have any place
We're living in times where men commit crimes
And crime don't have a face
We live in a political world
Icicles hangin' down
Wedding bells ring and angels sing
And clouds cover up the ground
We live in a political world
Wisdom is thrown into jail
It rots in a cell misguided as hell
With no one to pick up the trail
We live in a political world
Where mercy walks the plank
Life is in mirrors, death disappears
Up the steps into the nearest bank
We live in a political world
Courage is a thing of the past
The houses are haunted, the children aren't wanted
Your next day could be your last
We live in a political world
The one we can see and feel
But there's no one to check, it's all a stacked deck
We all know for sure that it's real
We live in a political world
The cities are a lonesome fear
Little by little, you turn in the middle
But you're never sure why you're here
We live in a political world
Under the microscope
You could travel anywhere and hang yourself there
You've always got more than enough rope
We live in a political world
Turning and a-thrashing about
As soon as you're awake, you're trained to take
What looks like the easy way out
We live in a political world
Where peace is not welcome at all
It's turned away from the door to wander some more
Or put up against the wall
We live in a political world
Every thing's hers and his
Climb into the flame and shout God's name
But you're not even sure what it is…
I’m not gonna embarrass myself by reminding you to be kind.. Live well, and Godspeed.
RESEARCH:
This fetid POS showed up in a 3 piece suit and a diaper in the journal Clinical Psychological Science (Vuorre & Przybylski, 2023).
