Is Intensive Couples Therapy Worth the Money?
Sunday, September 21, 2025. This is for a security conscious couple that I’ll be speaking to tomorrow who prefer to meet me on Signal.
Marriage retreats aren’t cheap, but studies suggest they may deliver faster, longer-lasting results than months of weekly sessions — if you’re brave enough to show up.
So perhaps you’re wondering if intensive couples therapy is worth the money? That’s a fair question.
Spending thousands of dollars on a marriage retreat can feel like betting your relationship on a long weekend with a stranger in a cardigan.
Yet the truth is, weekly therapy often feels like driving with the parking brake on — steady progress, sure, but painfully slow.
Intensives, by contrast, promise a fast track: a weekend or week where you and your partner are locked in a room long enough to either rediscover your love… or your lawyer’s number.
And yes, the research suggests that these compressed sessions can work — sometimes spectacularly so.
Marriage Retreats: What the Research Actually Says
Intensives sound like snake oil until you look at the numbers. When it comes to couples therapy, math has no pity.
Recent studies suggest that intensives are way more than just expensive handholding.
A research trial in Iran comparing intensive short-term dynamic psychotherapy with structural couple therapy found both formats improved family functioning.
They discovered, one sharpened intrapersonal skills (translation: getting your own act together), while the other improved interpersonal skills (translation: speaking to your spouse without sounding like you’re auditioning for a courtroom drama) (Saadatmand et al., 2024).
Meanwhile, research on Restoration Therapy intensives showed that couples not only improved after their marriage retreat but were still reporting higher marital satisfaction two years later (Ahlquist, 2022).
That’s longer than most Americans stick to a gym membership.
The success rate of couples therapy weekends isn’t perfect, but it’s not just a placebo effect either.
The Price Tag: Marriage Retreats vs. Weekly Therapy
Now for the painful part.
An individual couples therapy weekend retreat will cost you anywhere from $2,000 for a newbie to as much as $15,000 for a well-known thought leader, depending on the therapist, location, and whether they throw in a complimentary kombucha bar (Healing Collective Therapy).
Weekly therapy looks cheaper at $150–$400 an hour, until you realize you’ve been doing that for a year and a half with little more to show for it than a deeper hatred of folding laundry together.
Cost-effectiveness research backs this up.
Studies comparing integrative behavioral couples therapy (IBCT) to cheaper online programs found that longer in-person formats often deliver bigger gains, even if they sting the wallet more upfront (Salivar et al., 2020).
In other words: if you measure change per dollar, intensives may not be as indulgent as they sound.
The Catch: Follow-Up Matters
But here’s where it gets messy.
Marriage intensives can deliver rapid breakthroughs, but without follow-up they’re like crash diets: impressive at first, dangerous when you relapse.
The best-designed programs now build in aftercare — video check-ins, or structured assignments — because without interventions, old habits creep back in (Lebow et al., 2022).
Also, not every couple is a candidate. Intensive marriage retreats work best for partners who both want to be there.
If one is dragged along like a hostage, no amount of “intensity” will save you. And if there’s active abuse, addiction, or untreated trauma, you’re better off with longer-term, more specialized support.
So… Is Intensive Couples Therapy Worth It?
For the right couple, absolutely, yes.
The research is clear that intensive, science-based couples therapy can yield stronger, faster results than standard therapy, especially when combined with careful assessment, and a solid plan for follow-up care.
In other words, science-based couples therapy intensives are more like open-heart surgery than a vitamin supplement.
So is intensive marriage therapy really worth it?
Let’s put it this way: people drop five grand on vacations where they mostly argue about sunscreen, or on gorgeously updated kitchens that they never cook in.
At least with a couples therapy retreat, the arguing has a referee and the homework might actually outlast the receipts.
Some therapists rudely argue that you can pay now in therapy fees, or pay later in divorce filings.
The difference is that a competent couples therapist will hand you tools; a lawyer will hand you paperwork. And only one of them has even the faintest idea of how to save your marriage and family.
Frequently Asked Questions About Intensive Couples Therapy
How long does an intensive couples therapy retreat last?
Most marriage intensives run two to four days, with daily sessions ranging from four to eight hours. Some programs stretch to a full week, while others condense into a single weekend.
The goal is total and utter immersion: instead of weeks of one-hour sessions, you spend concentrated time unpacking long-standing issues. Most typically, my intensives involve a overall commitment to the process of at least 20 hours, or more.
What is the success rate of marriage intensives?
Studies suggest that couples therapy intensives can produce rapid improvements in marital satisfaction, with many couples reporting lasting gains a year or more later (Ahlquist, 2022).
One trial even found improvements holding at two years post-retreat. Of course, success rates vary depending on the couple’s motivation, the therapist’s skill, and whether follow-up support is in place.
How much does an intensive couples therapy weekend cost?
Group work doesn’t count. That’s just psychoeducation, which has its place..
Prices vary, but most individual intensive marriage retreats fall in the $2,000 to $15,000 range. For example, my fee is 5K, including 5-7 hours of online prep work.
Ultimately, your costs depend on your therapists’ preeminence and focused expertise, the length of the intensive, and whether accommodations or meals are included. While weekly therapy looks cheaper, couples often find intensives deliver far more concentrated change per dollar spent.
Who should not do an intensive marriage retreat?
Couples experiencing active domestic violence, untreated trauma, or serious substance abuse issues are really not good candidates for intensives. These situations typically require clinical work that’s a bit more specialized, as well as continuous, ongoing support. Likewise, if one partner is unwilling to participate, the intensive format may backfire.
Is intensive couples therapy better than weekly sessions?
Not always — it depends on your situation. YMMV.
Weekly therapy works well for gradual growth, steady accountability, and lower immediate cost.
Final thoughts
Intensives can be more effective for couples in crisis, as well as those seeking faster breakthroughs, or for partners with limited availability to commit to long-term weekly sessions.
Many therapists recommend combining both: an intensive to jumpstart progress, followed by an aftercare regime, or at the very least, regular check-ins to sustain your change!.
In person individual Intensives allow science-based couples therapists to use neuroscience in unprecedented ways. Motivation, and a shared agenda are essential for success.
I also typically require 5-7 hours of prep work beforehand.
Are you wondering if a couples therapy intensive will work for you? I can be reached here, if you have any questions.
Be Well, Stay Kind, and Godspeed.
REFERENCES:
Ahlquist, L. R. (2022). Effectiveness of Restoration Therapy in an intensive model. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy. https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/10664807211052481
Lebow, J., Chambers, A. L., Christensen, A., & Johnson, S. (2022). Couple therapy in the 2020s: Current status and emerging developments. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 48(1), 9–29. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10087549/
Saadatmand, N. S., Etemadi, O., Bahrami, F., & Fatehizadeh, M. (2024). Effectiveness of structural couple therapy and intensive short-term dynamic psychotherapy on intrapersonal and interpersonal skills and family function. Iranian Evolutionary Educational Psychology Journal, 6(4), 297-318. https://ieepj.hormozgan.ac.ir/article-1-935-en.pdf
Salivar, E. J. G., et al. (2020). Relative cost effectiveness of in-person and internet interventions for relationship distress. Journal of Family Psychology, 34(2), 165–176. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30537091