The “My Therapist Says” Meme

Friday, September 27, 2024.

The "My Therapist Says" meme has risen to viral status across the major social media platforms, but its significance goes far beyond mere humor.

It captures a moment in American culture where therapy and mental health have moved from private, stigmatized matters to public and often celebrated aspects of self-care.

This meme offers a perfect snapshot of how Americans grapple with personal growth, mental health, and changing values about what it means to be emotionally healthy nowadays.

The Emergence and Evolution of “My Therapist Says” in Internet Culture

The “My Therapist Says” meme didn’t appear in a vacuum.

It emerged out of a broader context where mental health awareness gradually became more mainstream, and discussing therapy openly shifted from taboo to socially acceptable—even trendy.

The meme fits neatly into a larger genre of mental health memes, which began gaining traction in the mid-2010s, aligning with a growing societal focus on self-care and emotional intelligence. Platforms like Instagram and TikTok helped propel this meme into mainstream culture, where users began to find comfort and community in shared therapeutic experiences.

The Instagram account “My Therapist Says”, founded by Lola Tash and Nicole Argiris, played a pivotal role in bringing this meme to viral status.

They aggregated and created memes that allowed people to share their frustrations, personal growth struggles, and therapy experiences, all while using humor to process the very real challenges of mental health management​ (Darcy Magazine)​(Bored Panda).

These memes became an important medium through which people could joke about what their therapists said during sessions, typically in an exaggerated or humorous way that resonated with those who have been through similar experiences.

The Cultural Shift Toward Therapy as Self-Care

The popularity of the “My Therapist Says” meme reflects broader American cultural shifts around self-care and emotional intelligence.

Over the past decade, particularly among millennials and Gen Z, therapy has become more normalized as a tool for personal growth and well-being, much like going to the gym for physical health. This shift stems from multiple factors:

  • The Mental Health Crisis: Rising rates of anxiety, depression, and stress, especially among younger generations, have led to more people seeking therapy than ever before (Twenge, 2018). Therapy is no longer something people hide; it's openly discussed as part of maintaining one’s mental well-being.

  • Therapy as a Trend: Therapy has become part of the broader self-care movement, often discussed alongside yoga, meditation, and wellness retreats. It’s not uncommon to hear people casually reference their therapists in social settings, and this shift is captured in the memes that often begin with "My therapist says..." as a lighthearted, yet meaningful, introduction to deeper reflections or challenges in everyday life.

  • Therapists as Cultural Figures: In the past, therapy might have been viewed with suspicion or even shame. Today, marriage and family therapists are viewed as trusted authorities who guide folks toward personal enlightenment and emotional resilience. The memes capture this dynamic, presenting the therapist as both wise and relatable, someone whose approachable advice we might both take seriously and humorously misinterpret.

  • Therapy as a Status Symbol: For some, therapy is a sign that they’re investing in their personal growth. Saying “My therapist says…” can be as much about conveying wisdom as it is about virtue signaling that one is dedicated to emotional self-improvement. Memes often reflect this balancing act of wanting to show pride in progress while recognizing the difficulty of actually applying therapeutic advice in real life.

Values Embedded in the “My Therapist Says” Meme

Several core values come to the surface when we examine the deeper cultural significance of the “My Therapist Says” meme:

  • Vulnerability: One of the meme’s greatest achievements is normalizing vulnerability. By humorously sharing the awkwardness, confusion, and challenges of therapy, these memes make it okay to admit that emotional growth isn’t always linear. People who share or relate to these memes are, in a way, acknowledging that personal development can be messy, difficult, and—sometimes—funny.

    • Example meme:
      Therapist: You have to be kind to yourself.
      Me: Okay. But what if I just don’t?

  • Self-Awareness and Humor: These memes reflect a certain self-awareness about the contradictions in therapy. Often, the punchline is that while the therapist offers wise advice, the client struggles to apply it in their daily life. This form of humor shows an understanding that growth is a process, and it’s okay to poke fun at one’s own missteps along the way.

    • Example meme:
      My therapist says I should prioritize myself more. Me, prioritizing a nap over my deadlines: Mission accomplished.

  • Destigmatization of Mental Health: The growing popularity of these memes is a direct reflection of how mental health conversations have shifted in the United States. What was once considered a private and often shameful subject is now widely discussed. The ability to joke about therapy signifies that therapy is no longer seen as something only for those in crisis but as a valuable tool for anyone seeking self-betterment.

    • Example meme:
      My therapist says I should work on my boundaries. Me: instantly avoids every family gathering forever.

  • Emotional Growth as a Lifelong Journey: Therapy memes reflect the reality that emotional growth is not a one-time achievement but an ongoing process. The “My Therapist Says” meme format captures how advice from therapy often needs to be continuously applied and reinterpreted in everyday life. There’s humor in the ongoing nature of this work, as folks joke about how difficult it is to "stay on track."

    • Example meme:
      Therapist: You should try journaling to track your progress. Me: Journals for 2 days and then stops for 3 months.

The Intersection of American Therapy Culture and Internet Humor

The “My Therapist Says” meme’s success reflects not only changes in American therapy culture but also the broader internet culture where humor often serves as a form of coping. In the age of oversharing on social media, these memes allow us to be open about our struggles while using humor to mitigate the heaviness of these topics.

In American culture, where individualism is highly valued, therapy is now often valued as a way to optimize oneself, whether emotionally, mentally, or socially.

The meme taps into this by using humor to bridge the gap between the idealized version of therapy (self-actualization and healing) and the reality (sometimes, we just don’t feel like applying our therapist’s advice).

The meme also plays into the American self-help ethos, where folks are expected to constantly improve themselves, but does so in a way that acknowledges the emotional difficulty and absurdity that can come with the therapeutic process. This combination of self-improvement culture with internet humor results in a meme that feels fresh, funny, and distinctly tied to modern American therapy practices.

The Future of the “My Therapist Says” Meme

As therapy continues to be embraced by mainstream culture, the “My Therapist Says” meme will likely remain relevant and evolve further.

Its ability to capture the contradictions of modern therapy culture—serious yet humorous, private yet public—ensures that it will continue to resonate with people who are navigating their mental health journeys.

Ultimately, this meme reflects how far American culture has come in normalizing mental health conversations while highlighting the value of humor in making those discussions more accessible and relatable.

I think it’s a healthy development that Americans are connecting real therapeutic advice with humorous self-awareness. Memes like this one create a space for us to engage with our emotional growth in a light-hearted but meaningful way.

Be Well, Stay Kind, and Godspeed.

REFERENCES:

Twenge, J. M. (2018). iGen: Why Today's Super-Connected Kids Are Growing Up Less Rebellious, More Tolerant, Less Happy--and Completely Unprepared for Adulthood. Atria Books.

Holt-Lunstad, J. (2017). The potential public health relevance of social isolation and loneliness. Public Policy & Aging Report, 27(4), 127-130.

Carter, C. S. (2014). Oxytocin pathways and the evolution of human behavior. Annual Review of Psychology, 65, 17-39. https://doi.org/10.1146/annurev-psych-010213-115110

Bored Panda. (2023). “My Therapist Says” Memes. Retrieved from https://www.boredpanda.com

Cosmopolitan. (2021). Inside the “My Therapist Says” Instagram Phenomenon. Retrieved from https://www.cosmopolitan.com

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