Is my child neurodivergent?
Tuesday, June 25, 2024.
Parenting can feel like a game of whack-a-mole: just when you think you’ve got it all figured out, another challenge pops up.
One question that might have you pondering during those sleepless nights is, “Is my child neurodivergent?”
As a family therapist interested in science and human behavior, I'm here to help you navigate this complex question.
Understanding Neurodivergence
Neurodivergence is an umbrella term that includes a variety of neurological differences. This includes autism spectrum disorder (ASD), attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), dyslexia, and more.
These conditions are not "problems" to be fixed but variations in human neurology that offer unique strengths and challenges.
It’s now estimated that about 20% of humanity is somehow neurodiverse, while 80% are neuro-normative.
Dr. Stephen Shore, an autism advocate, famously said, "If you've met one person with autism, you've met one person with autism." This highlights the diverse and complex manifestations of neurodivergence. But heredity plays an essential role.
Signs your child might be neurodivergent
You might wonder what behaviors or traits to look for in your child. Here are some common signs, though they can vary widely:
Communication Differences: Difficulty with verbal and non-verbal communication. This can mean delayed speech, a tendency to use a unique set of words, or difficulty understanding social cues.
Sensory Sensitivities: Overwhelmed by loud noises, bright lights, or certain textures. Conversely, some children might seek out sensory input.
Repetitive Behaviors: Engaging in repetitive actions or speech, such as flapping hands or repeating certain phrases.
Intense Interests: Deep, focused interest in specific topics, and consequently, talents and gifts may manifest.
Social Interaction Challenges: Difficulty making friends or engaging in ordinary, neuro-normative social activities.
Remember, spotting one or two of these signs doesn’t necessarily mean your child is neurodivergent. It’s the combination and persistence of these behaviors that warrant a closer look.
Seeking a diagnosis
If you suspect your child might be neurodivergent, the next step might be to seek a professional evaluation. A neuropsychologist or a developmental pediatrician can provide a comprehensive assessment.
However, this is a social justice issue, as many poor and middle-class families may struggle to navigate the diagnostic process. It’s also true that some thought leaders differ on the value of a formal assessment.
In the words of Dr. Temple Grandin, an autism advocate and animal science professor, "Early intervention is key, but so is understanding and patience." It’s hard to argue against getting an early diagnosis. It can help tailor support and interventions to your child's needs, enabling them to thrive.
Organizations that can help
Organizations like the Asperger/Autism Network (AANE) in Watertown, Massachusetts, offer valuable resources for families navigating neurodivergence. AANE provides support groups, educational workshops, and individual consultations.
Other noteworthy organizations include:
Autism Society of America: Offers nationwide support and resources.
Embracing neurodiversity with optimism
It's essential to approach neurodivergence with optimism. Neurodivergent folks often possess unique talents and perspectives. For example, many people with autism excel in fields requiring attention to detail, like computer programming and mathematics. People with ADHD often thrive in dynamic, fast-paced environments.
As Dr. Ross Greene, author of "The Explosive Child," notes, "Kids do well if they can." Our job as parents and caregivers is to create environments where they can succeed.
The significance of nurturing neurodivergent brains
Nurturing neurodivergent brains effectively can have profound implications for the human experiment. As we embrace and support neurodivergent individuals, we unlock a wealth of untapped potential. Neurodivergent thinkers often bring innovative solutions and creative problem-solving skills that can drive progress in various fields.
Historically, some of the most brilliant minds have exhibited traits of neurodivergence.
Albert Einstein, who had traits of dyslexia and possibly autism, revolutionized physics with his theories. Today, we see neurodivergent individuals excelling in technology, science, and the arts, contributing to a rising intelligence and a more inclusive society. We need all kinds of brains, and we need to relax many of our neuro-normative assumptions.
Areas needing more research
While we’ve made significant strides in understanding neurodivergence, there's still much to learn.
In my opinion, research areas that need more attention include:
Gender Differences in Neurodivergence: Understanding how neurodivergence manifests differently in boys and girls.
Impact of Co-occurring Conditions: Studying how conditions like anxiety or depression intersect with neurodivergence.
Long-term Outcomes: We are in dire need of more longitudinal studies to track neurodivergent folks through time.
Final thoughts
Navigating the world of neurodivergence can feel daunting, because it is.
But please remember, you’re not alone.
Support, resources, and communities are available to help you and your child thrive. Our culture is experiencing a massive shift that recognizes and prizes human differences in cognition. We live in a golden age of neuroscience, and I, for one, am exceedingly grateful for that.
Embrace the journey with humor, patience, and an open heart. After all, as Albert Einstein (who was obviously neurodivergent) once said, “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”
Be Well, Stay Kind, and Godspeed.
REFERENCES:
American Psychiatric Association. (2013). Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders (5th ed.).
Greene, R. W. (2010). The explosive child: A new approach for understanding and parenting easily frustrated, chronically inflexible children. HarperCollins.
Grandin, T. (2006). Thinking in pictures: My life with autism. Vintage.
Shore, S. (2003). Beyond the wall: Personal experiences with autism and Asperger Syndrome. Autism Asperger Publishing Co.
