The Power of Intimacy: Boosting Your sexual well-being
Thursday, July 18, 2024.
As a science-based couples therapist, I see firsthand how intimacy can transform relationships.
Recent research published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior highlights the significant role intimacy plays in enhancing sexual desire, satisfaction, and reducing sexual distress.
Let's explore these findings and understand how daily experiences of intimacy can positively impact your relationship.
Why Intimacy Matters
Sexual well-being is crucial for both physical and mental health, as well as the overall quality of a relationship. Yet, more than half of the population reports dissatisfaction with their sex lives, often worsening over time.
This study by Sophie Bergeron and her team at the University of Montreal sheds light on how daily intimacy can be a game-changer.
How The Study Was Conducted
The Study: Researchers recruited 211 couples from diverse backgrounds, including various sexual and gender identities. These couples, who had been living together for at least a year, completed daily diaries for 35 days, reporting their experiences of intimacy and sexual well-being. A follow-up survey after 12 months provided insights into the long-term effects of intimacy.
Daily Intimacy and Its Benefits
Daily Diaries: Each evening, partners independently reported their feelings of intimacy, positive sexual thoughts, and overall sexual well-being.
On days when participants felt more intimate, they experienced higher sexual desire and satisfaction, and lower sexual distress. Intimacy, characterized by empathic responses, partner disclosure, and self-disclosure, fostered a more positive sexual experience.
Dr. Sophie Bergeron, the study’s lead author, explained, "Intimacy, i.e., being understanding, caring, and validating toward your partner and self-disclosing personal thoughts and feelings to them – fosters greater sexual desire and sexual satisfaction and lower sexual distress on a day-to-day basis for you and your partner."
Long-Term Benefits: The study also found that couples who reported high levels of daily intimacy experienced increased sexual desire and satisfaction even a year later. This lasting benefit was linked to their continued focus on positive sexual experiences.
Bergeron shared her surprise at the findings, "We were happily surprised to see that daily intimacy was linked to greater sexual desire and sexual satisfaction one year later. Cultivating intimacy in your daily life with your partner is beneficial for your sexual well-being and theirs too!"
Practical Insights
The research shows that intimacy isn’t just about grand romantic gestures; it’s about the everyday moments of connection and understanding. Here are some practical ways to build intimacy in your relationship:
Communicate Openly: Share your thoughts, dreams, and fears with your partner. Let them into your inner world.
Show Empathy: Understand and validate your partner’s feelings. Being there for each other fosters a deeper connection.
Self-Disclosure: Open up about your feelings and experiences. This vulnerability can strengthen your bond.
The Impact of Intimacy
The study found that intimacy not only benefits the individual but also positively influences the partner’s sexual well-being. When one partner feels more intimate, it boosts the other partner's attention to positive sexual cues, enhancing their sexual satisfaction and reducing distress.
Bergeron noted, "These cross-partner effects highlight the reciprocal nature of intimacy and its role in enhancing sexual well-being within relationships."
Limitations and Future Research
While the study provides valuable insights, it has some limitations.
The requirement for regular sexual activity may have excluded couples experiencing significant sexual or relationship difficulties, limiting the generalizability of the results.
Additionally, the sample lacked cultural and ethnic diversity, which could affect the applicability of the findings to non-Western populations.
"Ideally, we would need to replicate these findings with people from non-WEIRD countries," (psst…Non-WEIRD countries are those countries that do not apply to at least one of the five WEIRD characteristics. So, for example, countries like Japan are educated, industrialised, rich and democratic), however, are not Western. Bergeron noted. "Does intimacy work the same way in different cultures? We do not know this yet."
Final thoughts
This study highlights the powerful role of intimacy in promoting sexual well-being.
By fostering understanding, empathy, and self-disclosure in your relationship, you can enhance both your own and your partner’s sexual satisfaction and reduce sexual distress. Intimacy isn’t just a fleeting moment; it’s a lasting bond that can transform your relationship.
Be Well, Stay Kind, and Godspeed.
RESEARCH:
Bergeron, S., Vaillancourt-Morel, M.-P., Péloquin, K., & Rosen, N. O. (2024). Intimacy Promotes Couples’ Sexual Well-Being on a Daily Basis and Over One Year: The Role of Positive Sexual Cues. Archives of Sexual Behavior.
