The power of accepting negative emotions…
Monday, January 29, 2024.
Accepting negative emotions just might be the key to emotional well-being...
Humans who make a habit out of judging their emotions, such as grief, rage, or sorrow as somehow “bad” or “unhelpful” are more likely to experience ongoing anxiety and depression, according to breaking research.
In contrast, humans who roll with punches of life, and accept negative emotions tend to have better mental health in the long haul..
It is another study to add to a plethora of earlier research that consistently demonstrates how determinative it is how a human responds to uncomfortable emotions.
Here’s the thing…feelings are not just inherently good or bad depending on whether on how they feel in the body…
Are there any, if not many, scenarios in which negative emotions can be positive?
Absolutely. For example, anger can motivate someone to call out a wrong that has been done to them, or to others. Righteous indignation and good trouble have changed the world more than once.
The gift of fear reminds us to avoid risky circumstances. While anxiety can provoke planning to best solve a problem.
Emotions exist for specific reasons, so simply judging all negative ones as bad can compromise your mental health.
One period when many experience more negative emotions is during the holiday season, said Dr. Emily Willroth, the study’s first author:
“Oftentimes, people feel guilty because society tells us that the holidays are supposed to be filled only with positive emotions.
But this isn’t realistic for everyone, and it’s OK to feel stressed, overwhelmed, sad or disappointed.”
How the study was conducted
The new findings emerged from a research project which surveyed over 1,000 humans online about their psychological health and habits of judging their emotions.
Dr. Willroth is Assistant Professor, and Director of the Well-being and Emotion across the Lifespan Lab at the magnificent "WELL" Lab at Washington University, in St. Louis.
Dr. Willroth clarified the findings:
“Our research suggests that it may be beneficial to accept those unpleasant emotions as normal responses to the situation that will likely pass with time, rather than judging those emotional responses as bad or wrong.”
Being accepting of emotions does not necessarily mean blind acceptance, or submission to forces which created a confrontation, explained Dr. Willroth:
“It’s OK and often beneficial to try to change the situations that give rise to negative emotions.
For example, you might make changes to a busy holiday schedule so that you feel less overwhelmed, or you might set boundaries with your family to reduce feelings of sadness or anger.”
Discussing your feelings can aid in your acceptance, of them because discovering emotions is a first step toward normalizing them.
Moving from judging your feelings to simply accepting them requires the growing realization that emotions they are a normal and natural part of being human, and they can, and do, pass.
Dr. Willroth summed up her advice on how to apply these research findings:
“If you notice yourself judging your emotions, don’t dwell on it.
If you find that you frequently experience intense unpleasant feelings or unpleasant feelings that last a long time, and that disrupt your quality of life, though, it may be helpful to reach out to a mental health professional.”
Final thoughts…
Acceptance is a somewhat unpopular concept in the human sphere. We are a species which seeks domination and mastery.
The notion of acceptance is defined by actively allowing negative experiences to simply exist in our life without trying to change, rationalize, avoid, deny, or evade them.
Acceptance enables humans to open ourselves to profoundly difficult, and unpleasant feelings or thoughts, and permit them to exist in the moment without trying to suppress them.
Acceptance provides an opportunity to move on more quickly from issues and struggles, which is a hallmark of mental health as we move through time.
Acceptance is surrendering to the suck, if not actively embracing it.
Acceptance is often mentioned in the same breath as mindfulness. The varieties of human spirituality and religions have often mentioned its utility as a bridge to transcendence and growth.
Serenity Prayer…the lesser known long version…
God grant me the Serenity
To accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And the Wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time,
Enjoying one moment at a time.
Accepting hardship as a pathway to peace.
Taking, as he did, this sinful world as it is,
Not as I would like it.
Trusting that he will make all things right,
If I surrender to his will.
That I may be reasonably happy in this world
And supremely happy in the next.
Reinhold Niebuhr, Theologian
Be well, stay kind, and Godspeed.
REFERENCES:
Willroth, E. C., Young, G., Tamir, M., & Mauss, I. B. (2023). Judging emotions as good or bad: Individual differences and associations with psychological health. Emotion, 23(7), 1876–1890. https://doi.org/10.1037/emo0001220
