17 skills of effective decision-making
Sunday, October 16, 2023. A few years ago, after a rash of extremely bad decisions during the toughest time in my life, I researched, for myself, the science of making better decisions.
What I have noticed since then is that these 17 ideas worked. I’m offering them to you now, gentle reader, because I’m also invested in also helping you to make better decisions as well…
The inability to make good decisions isn’t always a moral deficit. Sometimes Developmental Trauma, (that is my issue), and other afflictions (depression, anxiety, etc…) can impede your decision-making skills.
When we lack mental health and a regulated nervous system, making effective and appropriate decisions can be hit or miss.
However, by hacking our brains and nervous system to compensate for our cognitive distortions, we can compensate for our mind’s inherent, predictable flaws.
Making appropriate decisions in business, in matters of money, and of the heart, can sometimes be challenging.
Too many therapists smile vacantly and attempt to soothe us by explaining that the human mind is wonderful and nobly designed.
I like my mind too, even when it hogties me with the esoteric threads of my own bullsh*t …so thoroughly that I can’t find my ass with both hands.
In this blog post, I’m going to help you to run your impaired nervous system with a bit more skill.
Here are 17 magnificent hacks, drawn from neuroscience on the best ways to improve your decision-making skills in working with the part of you that wants, and the other more responsible part of you, that is more patient and strategic, and knows what you must do for an optimal outcome.
Foundational hack: You are a dyad…
Research explains that is a struggle with a part of you that wants (we’ll call them W).
W is a hedonist. W wants to get as much pleasure as they possibly can, right fu*king now, bless your heart.
The other part of you is most likely, a higher functioning adult. This is the part of you that can plan, defer gratification, and hold your tongue, because you have a larger, grander goal in mind. It’s a part of you that knows what it should do.. and knows what it must do to to achieve a predetermined aim.
Let’s call this part of you M, for what you feel you must do. M is kinda dull. This part of you remembers what you must do in order to eat healthily, floss, watch your alcohol intake, etc.
So it’s W and M that thrash out your decision making. Humans have been tortured by conflicting “wants” and “musts” because good decision making skills, for some of us, are not an inheritance. they must be acquired instead.
Decide ahead of time
Sometimes you’ll need to clip your old wanting self off at the knees. One of my clients was aggravated by the amount of money she was spending on Etsy and Ali Baba.
So she decided in advance by getting a website blocking app. This was a decision that was made in advance because she felt that she needed to respect her husband’s complaints by getting her unnecessary spending under control.
When we make decisions in advance it’s the knowledge of what we must do that, hopefully informs our decision.
It doesn’t matter what area of your life is under consideration. If you make the decision in advance, secure in the knowledge of what you must do, you’re far more likely to experience a good outcome.
Slow down your decisional process by always considering alternatives to what W ardently desires…
Research on this is clear. When you heed the W part of you and don’t remember to slow down to consider alternatives, W will quickly hijack your intellect to justify that impulsive decision, and suggest to M that there are no viable alternatives.
Without comparisons, it’s easier for W to justify what it wants. Absent comparison, that’s emotionally sloppy thinking.
By comparing options, though, research finds that humans are much more able to make decisions that better serve their long-term interests.
Remember that our brains are not good at evaluating evidence. Give W the fish-eye. Slow down the urgency by forcing yourself to generate alternatives to also consider.
This is what is called counter-factual thinking: thinking about the opposite helps us make better decisions.
Do a cost-benefit exploration
Why do I call it an exploration and not a cost benefit analysis? Because when we use the word “analysis” we’re giving ourselves too much credit.
Weighing costs and benefits is trite and familiar decision-making advice. But it’s useless until you also factor in what I’m about to tell you:
Research shows that the human mind tends to to hyper focus on either costs, or benefits; to fairly consider both takes considerably more effort and consideration than we assume…
We often fail to consider, or we otherwise marginalize the ‘opportunity cost.’ That is to say if we decide to do X, that also eliminates Y from consideration.
Reframe… Reframe… Reframe…
Most of us do not realize just how porous our waking awareness can be. The human mind floats on a sea of context.
And where do we get this context from? We get it from everything we bestow our attention upon; Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, everything we view is seeking to shift us into a new frame.
Hold on to your decisional power tightly.
Think about the problem your own way, with your own preferences.
Correlation doesn’t equal causation
When you are exploring all the factors you’ll need to consider in making a decision, remember that old chestnut correlation does not equal causation.
For example, did you know that there’s a clear and exceedingly tight correlation between ice cream sales and shark attacks?
Does this mean that if you consume ice cream, you’re more likely to be attacked by a shark?
Not likely. The more likely explanation is that more humans consume ice cream and get in the ocean when it’s warmer outside, which explains why these two variables are so highly correlated.
Although ice cream sales and shark attacks are highly correlated, one is in no way a source of causation.
Correlation doesn’t equal causation.
Anticipate your human weakness and your impulsive decision-making…
If you’re in the wrong place at the wrong time, and in the wrong state, your best skills may fail you in the face of a truly vicious temptation.
Humans reliably fail to grasp just how far into the Ditch of Their Own Undoing (I just made that up..) their emotions can banish them.
Use any method you know. Any method you have any degree of success with. Continue to seek out the skills you must acquire to counter your impulsivity. I can help with that. Be humble, and plan ahead.
Commitment devices
One way of improving decision-making in the face of impulsivity is by using commitment devices.
When we use a well-designed commitment device, we might impede our tendency to act on impulse by committing ourselves to a decision that is in our long-term interests.
Commitment devices allow us to take the choice away from the impulsive W part of ourselves.
Here are some methods people use to pre-commit to long-term interests:
Only buy ‘bad’ unhealthy snacks in small packets.
Commit to a block of therapy sessions.
One of my clients is an exceedingly wealthy self-made man, When he was a kiddo he had a paper route, and a steely-eyed determination to buy a new bike. He told me how he stuffed coin and cash into a sort of piggy bank that can only be smashed to access the money. A more grown up version are investment vehicles that lock your money away in a long-term commitment.
Commitment devices work best when they are custom made to suit your own quirks, and particular preferences.
You’ll have to figure out what sort of commitment device works best for honing your personal decision-making skills.
Commitment devices are decisions you make with a ’cool head’ right now, to bind yourself so that you don’t do something regrettable when you have a ‘hot head’ in the future.” — Daniel Goldstein
Have a bias for being as concrete AF
Human decision-making of quality focuses on the creation of concrete plans and specific goals.
Humans get better outcomes with concrete AF goals; abstract goals like “I wanna meditate more” or “I wanna lose some weight” are bullsh*t.
Substitute these with specific and concrete details: “I want to meditate for 20 minutes at 7 am every morning” and “I want to lose 10 pounds by my birthday.”
Stress and decision-making
It is clearly better to carry out your decision-making process when your relaxed, rested, and reflective.
That is because feeling stressed changes the way people assess the risk against the reward. (Mather & Lighthall, 2012).
Surprisingly, it important to also know that when you are under stress, you are more likely to focus on the positive more than you would if you were not stressed.
Professor Mara Mather, who co-authored the research, said:
“Stress seems to help people learn from positive feedback and impairs their learning from negative feedback.”
For example, imagine a person deciding whether to take a new job.
When under stress, they might give more weight to benefits of a higher salary while ignoring the longer commute.
When not under stress, though, the negative aspects of the choice would matter more.
Imagine your decision-making will be reviewed by a higher power
Here is a thought experiment. What if you had to show this decision to someone you deeply respected? When we think someone will inspect our decisional output, we tend to be less sloppy, and make more of a cognitive effort. This will help lead to a better decision.
Even if no-one you deeply respect is checking up on you, imagine what their reaction might be… if they were privy to your decision… What if God was conducting quality control on your decisions?
Would you be proud to show what you decided?
Make one-shot decisions
Don’t make self-indulgent deals with yourself. All sorts of weird sh*t starts happening when we imagine the choice we just made is but one in a series.
Stop justifying eating the cake today, by telling yourself that you’ll eat like refuge for the rest of the week.
Decisions have a unity and a totality . No ‘ifs’ and ‘buts’ and no tortuous logic to get what we want.
Shut down your W. Make one-shot decisions.
What the fu*k am I gonna do here? Am I going to honor my values right here, right now or what?
Ask yourself…what will this decision look like a year from now?
When making decisions we are influenced by whatever thoughts and emotions are inhabiting our noggins at the present moment.
Learn to distance yourself from the decision by asking yourself about the significance of this decision at a future point in time.
Another thing. Decisions of great import and significance are usually of higher quality after a good night’s sleep.
This advice has been offered in many forms, and risks sounding obvious. But please remember. It can be incredibly challenging to distance yourself from the emotional charge of an important decision..
Recognize the power of bullsh*t stories. Learn to recognize manipulative, emotional narrratives…
Vivid or personal stories are ofter leveraged to arouse a preferred emotional outcome.
Our minds are both enthralled and captivated by the sensational over the ordinary and the everyday.
Look carefully at the source of the information that you are relying upon to make a decision– are you being emotionally manipulated?
Decisions vary in significance
It’s simply an obvious fact of life that Some decisions are just more important than others. That means some decisions are of little import or significance, In other words, just decide and be done with it. Yeah, it’s better just to choose and be done with it.
Ha! But the trick is understanding how to discern a monumental decision from a trite selection. While your experience will help inform that decision, I can help with that as well.
Hunger and decision-making
Here is a very powerful hack. Avoid making decisions when you are hungry. Here is the issue. When our stomach grumbles, our poor little minds collapse into tunnel vision and short time thinking.
And I’m not talking about deciding to pull into McDonalds, instead of waiting to get home and eat healthy. I’m saying that when you are experiencing hunger you suck at making any fu*king decisions.
Here’s the trouble. Being hungry makes humans think decidedly more short-term — not just about what to eat, but across all areas of you life, including your finances! (Skrynka & Vincent, 2019).
Hungry people are willing to settle for smaller rewards that they can get sooner, ignoring the chance to make more money by being patient, and deferring gratification. .
Hunger ruins human self-control, making them grasp for rewards now, rather than wait, as they normally would for gratification.
Dr. Benjamin Vincent, study co-author, said:
“People generally know that when they are hungry they shouldn’t really go food shopping because they are more likely to make choices that are either unhealthy or indulgent.
Our research suggests this could have an impact on other kinds of decisions as well.
Say you were going to speak with a pensions or mortgage advisor – doing so while hungry might make you care a bit more about immediate gratification at the expense of a potentially more rosy future.”
Be rational when making decisions
You might be thinking “no sh*t, Sherlock” … but please hear me out.
The research strongly suggest that just reminding yourself to think in a rational manner could help you make better decisions. The secondary benefit of the hack of just “remembering” the value of rational thought will possibly also activate awareness of all the other hacks detailed in this blog post.
Well, there you have it….
This is some of the best information from neuroscience on just how to make better decisions. These skills have helped me massively improve my own decision making ability, and I sincerely hope they do likewise for you.
Be well, Stay kind, and Godspeed.
RESEARCH:
Mather, M., & Lighthall, N. R. (2012). Risk and Reward Are Processed Differently in Decisions Made Under Stress. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 21(1), 36-41. https://doi.org/10.1177/0963721411429452
Milkman, K. L., Rogers, T., & Bazerman, M. H. (2008). Harnessing Our Inner Angels and Demons: What We Have Learned About Want/Should Conflicts and How That Knowledge Can Help Us Reduce Short-Sighted Decision Making. Perspectives on Psychological Science, 3(4), 324-338. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1745-6924.2008.00083.x
Skrynka, J., Vincent, B.T. Hunger increases delay discounting of food and non-food rewards. Psychon Bull Rev 26, 1729–1737 (2019). https://doi.org/10.3758/s13423-019-01655-0
