Lessons on self-control and self-discipline: 12 research-backed techniques

Thursday, June 6, 2024.

Self-control and self-discipline are the unsung heroes of our success stories.

Those who master the art of self-control tend to enjoy greater popularity, success, and even a slower aging process.

Meanwhile, those with low self-control often grapple with overeating, addictions, and underachievement.

But fear not, gentle reader, for here are 12 scientifically-backed techniques to boost your self-control!

1. Respect Low Self-Control

Self-control is like a battery that runs out if you use it too much (Vohs et al., 2000).

Depleting this battery can lead to lower glucose levels (Gailliot et al., 2007), making you more susceptible to temptation. This phenomenon is known as 'ego-depletion.' So, recognize when your self-control is running low and avoid temptation during these times. The first step to mastering self-control is knowing when you're at your weakest.

2. Pre-Commit for Self-Control

Decide before you're in a tempting situation. Research shows that pre-committing to difficult goals can boost performance. In one study, students who imposed strict deadlines on themselves performed better than those who didn't (Ariely & Wertenbroch, 2002). So, leave your future self with fewer options to mess up. Only take a limited amount of money when shopping or stock your fridge with healthy foods to avoid temptation.

3. Use Rewards for Self-Discipline

Rewards are like carrots on a stick—they can motivate you to stay on track. Trope and Fishbach (2000) found that participants who had a self-imposed reward in mind were better at making short-term sacrifices for long-term gains. So, go ahead and promise yourself that treat for sticking to your goals. It really works!

4. Penalties for Lack of Self-Control

Just as rewards work, so do penalties. Trope and Fishbach (2000) discovered that the threat of punishment encourages people to stick to their long-term goals. Promise yourself a penalty for bad behavior and you'll be more likely to avoid it. It's the classic carrot and stick approach—both are effective.

5. Fight the Unconscious

Our unconscious minds love to sabotage our best intentions. Fishbach et al. (2003) found that mere suggestions of temptation can lead us astray. However, the same is true for goals—unconsciously triggered goals can help us stay on track. So, avoid temptations and surround yourself with things that promote your goals. Don't test your self-control if you can avoid it.

6. Adjust Expectations

Being optimistic about your ability to avoid temptations can boost self-control. Studies suggest that optimistic participants stick to their tasks longer than those who make accurate predictions about reaching goals (Zhang & Fishbach, 2010). So, allow yourself to overestimate how easy it will be to reach your goal. Just don't venture too far into fantasy land.

7. Adjust Values

Changing how you value both goals and temptations can improve self-control. Research shows that devaluing temptations and increasing the value of goals boosts performance (Fishbach et al., 2009). When you value your goal more, you naturally orient yourself toward it. Conversely, devaluing temptations helps you avoid them.

8. Use Emotions for Self-Discipline

The heart often rules the head, so use your emotions to increase self-control. In one study, children resisted eating marshmallows by thinking of them as 'white clouds' (Mischel & Baker, 1975). Cool down the emotions associated with temptations and boost the pull toward your goals by thinking about the positive emotions of achieving them—like pride and excitement.

9. Self-Affirmation for Self-Control

Self-affirmations can help you avoid bad habits by reaffirming your core beliefs, whether it's family, creativity, or anything you hold dear. When participants in one study used self-affirmations, their self-control was replenished (Uziel & Baumeister, 2017). Reflecting on core values can top-up your self-control when it's running low.

10. Think Abstractly for Self-Discipline

Abstract thinking can boost self-control. Fujita et al. (2006) found that people thinking abstractly were better at avoiding temptation and persisting at difficult tasks. To think abstractly, focus on the reasons why you're doing something rather than just how you're doing it.

11. Being Busy Breeds Self-Control

People who feel busy have more self-control (Kim et al., 2018). Busyness gives a sense of self-importance, leading to better lifestyle choices. Busy people often choose healthier foods, save more for retirement, and exercise more.

12. Feeling Grateful Boosts Self-Control

Gratitude can increase self-control and reduce impulsive behaviors. People who cultivate gratitude towards everyday events are more patient. Professor David DeSteno said:

"We can all point to the five things in our lives that we’re most grateful for, but if we keep thinking about those, we’ll habituate to them—they’re going to stop being interesting. Those kinds of daily gratitude boosters will function like a vaccine against impulsiveness and enhance self-control and future-orientedness."

The Biggest Irony About Self-Control

The desire for self-control often comes too late. Ironically, wanting high self-control can reduce your self-control (Uziel & Baumeister, 2017). The problem is that a strong desire for self-control signals to our minds that we lack it. To avoid these maddening double-binds, plan ahead. Dr. Liad Uziel explains:

"In order for desire for self-control to carry beneficial effects, it must arise at a point where change is feasible. Changing one’s self-control is a very difficult challenge and must be considered a journey, not a one-shot occurrence."

Final thoughts

There's a comforting and yet profoundly absurd thought that giving in to temptation just and only once will make us stronger.

However, psychological research suggests otherwise. Students who had a good break from studying didn’t show increased motivation when they returned (Converse & Fishbach, 2008). If all else fails, know that giving in won’t bring you back stronger.

Worse, it may increase your tendency to give in again in the future. Give that some thought…

I hope you find this research interesting and helpful.

Be Well, Stay Kind, and Godspeed

REFERENCES:

Ariely, D., & Wertenbroch, K. (2002). Procrastination, deadlines, and performance: Self-control by precommitment. Psychological Science, 13(3), 219-224.

Converse, B. A., & Fishbach, A. (2008). A Self-Control Resource Model of Affect Regulation. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 44(4), 912-919.

Fishbach, A., & Trope, Y. (2005). The substitutability of external control and self-control. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 41(3), 256-270.

Fishbach, A., Friedman, R. S., & Kruglanski, A. W. (2003). Leading us not into temptation: Momentary allurements elicit overriding goal activation. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 84(2), 296-309.

Fujita, K., Trope, Y., Liberman, N., & Levin-Sagi, M. (2006). Construal levels and self-control. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 90(3), 351-367.

Gailliot, M. T., Baumeister, R. F., DeWall, C. N., Maner, J. K., Plant, E. A., Tice, D. M., ... & Schmeichel, B. J. (2007). Self-control relies on glucose as a limited energy source: Willpower is more than a metaphor. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 92(2), 325-336.

Kim, S., Sussman, A. B., & Jordan, J. (2018). The emotional cost of doing nothing: Feeling busy and self-importance lead to self-control. Journal of Consumer Research, 45(5), 1030-1046.

Mischel, W., & Baker, N. (1975). Cognitive appraisals and transformations in delay behavior. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 31(2), 254-261.

Nordgren, L. F., van Harreveld, F., & van der Pligt, J. (2009). The restraint bias: How the illusion of self-restraint promotes impulsive behavior. Psychological Science, 20(12), 1523-1528.

Trope, Y., & Fishbach, A. (2000). Counteractive self-control in overcoming temptation. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 79(4), 493-506.

Uziel, L., & Baumeister, R. F. (2017). The self-control irony: Desire for self-control limits exertion of self-control. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 43(5), 693-707.

Vohs, K. D., Baumeister, R. F., Schmeichel, B. J., Twenge, J. M., Nelson, N. M., & Tice, D. M. (2008). Making choices impairs subsequent self-control: A limited-resource account of decision making, self-regulation, and active initiative. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 94(5), 883-898.

Zhang, Y., & Fishbach, A. (2010). Counteracting obstacles with optimistic predictions. Journal of Experimental Psychology: General, 139(1), 16